A consent violation is an occurrence where someone believes their consent was broken or a set boundary was crossed.
Only the person who experienced harm within the event gets to decide if their consent was violated.
If you have experienced a consent violation, we have resources below that can help.
If you have been accused of a consent violation, or are responsible for harm, we also have resources for you that can help.
If you would like to speak to a consent advocate for peer emotional support and a more tailored recommendation of resources, please reach out.
Lastly, please note that most of the resources below are directed to those living in the US. If you have suggestions or resources to add to this page, please reach out.
Only the person who experienced harm within the event gets to decide if their consent was violated.
If you have experienced a consent violation, we have resources below that can help.
If you have been accused of a consent violation, or are responsible for harm, we also have resources for you that can help.
If you would like to speak to a consent advocate for peer emotional support and a more tailored recommendation of resources, please reach out.
Lastly, please note that most of the resources below are directed to those living in the US. If you have suggestions or resources to add to this page, please reach out.
My Consent Has Been Violated - What Now?
First, it's important to recognize that no matter what, no one deserves to have their consent violated in any way.
If you've experienced harm, you deserve safety and support, not blame or shame.
In the immediate aftermath, we recommend getting to a safe place and/or calling for help.
Food, water, a warm blanket, breathing exercises, and/or movement like shaking or rocking may be helpful for moving through an acute trauma response (you may be experiencing physical symptoms and emotions like shock, numbness, anger, sadness, confusion, or something else entirely - trauma responses can present in a variety of ways).
Once you feel calmer and more grounded, consider reaching out to a consent advocate or to one of the resources below for help figuring out what to do next. Do keep in mind you don't have to do anything though - it's not ok for anyone to pressure you into taking action you don't fully consent to. Your only responsibility is to take care of yourself. We also have resources for long-term healing from trauma - because you shouldn't have to do it alone.
If you've experienced harm, you deserve safety and support, not blame or shame.
In the immediate aftermath, we recommend getting to a safe place and/or calling for help.
Food, water, a warm blanket, breathing exercises, and/or movement like shaking or rocking may be helpful for moving through an acute trauma response (you may be experiencing physical symptoms and emotions like shock, numbness, anger, sadness, confusion, or something else entirely - trauma responses can present in a variety of ways).
Once you feel calmer and more grounded, consider reaching out to a consent advocate or to one of the resources below for help figuring out what to do next. Do keep in mind you don't have to do anything though - it's not ok for anyone to pressure you into taking action you don't fully consent to. Your only responsibility is to take care of yourself. We also have resources for long-term healing from trauma - because you shouldn't have to do it alone.
Sexual Violence Resources (sexual abuse, assault, & harassment):
- RAINN: Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) or chat
- StrongHearts Native Helpline: Call 1.844.7NATIVE (762-8483) or chat
- Me Too Movement Resources
- National Sexual Violence Resource Center
- Hotlines for Survivors of Violence and Trauma
- Hot Peach Pages - International List of Sexual and Domestic Violence Agencies
- Was I Raped? Answers About Sexual Assault, Rape, and Consent - Greatist
- Sexual Harassment - RAINN
- Workplace Sexual Harassment - Women Against Abuse
Domestic Violence (physical, emotional, verbal, financial, digital and sexual abuse):
- National Domestic Violence Hotline
- Anti-Violence Project - focus on LGBTQ & HIV-affected communities
- The Network La Red - focus on LGBTQ, kinky, & polyamorous communities
Bullying and Harassment Resources:
- Right to Be
- Stop Bullying - US government site
Resources for Healing from Trauma
Learn More and Find Support:
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Body-Based (Somatic) Healing: |
Animal Therapy:
- Assistance Dogs International - help finding a potential therapy dog
- EQUUSOMA Equine-Assisted Trauma Therapy
Articles:
- How to Feel Your Feelings and Why You Should Try - Aida Mandauley
Books:
- Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
- Writing Ourselves Whole: Using the Power of Your Own Creativity to Recover and Heal from Sexual Trauma by Jen Cross
- Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence — from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror by Judith Herman
I Have Been Accused of /
I am Responsible for
a Consent Violation - What Now?
Coming soon!